This is True {Unspeakable} Joy

This is True {Unspeakable} Joy

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Highlight 2011 forgotten

Oops!  I forgot one MAJOR highlight from 2011!

Highlight #11:

I had two echocardiograms on my heart last month.  The first one was a disaster.  I’m pretty sure the tech couldn’t even find my heart in there let alone acquire accurate measurements of my aorta and such.  So, I had a second echo the following week (12/21 or so).  Natalie and Finley accompanied me to the echo.  The tech was amazing.  He even let Fin push the buttons and “take pictures” of my heart.  I think she thought that was pretty neat.  She enjoys being in on every detail of my health.  I think she may have a medical career in her future…I digress…Anyway, the tech got awesome pics of my heart.  At the end, he had me sit up (usually with echos/sonograms you have to lay down) and he got the best images of my heart that way.  I have had 30 years of echos and he got the very best images thus far!  Anyway, are you just dying to know the results?  Thankfully (and miraculously), my cardiologist called me the next day with the results!  Basically, everything has stayed the same.  Almost better he said.  Um, that doesn’t happen!  So, praise the Lord.  In the doctor’s opinion I still need surgery and urgently, but in my opinion (since we’ve still yet to find a surgeon that will do the surgery) “keep calm and carry on…”

Resolute

**Originally written January 7, 2012. Posted February 11, 2013.

Do you make New Years Resolutions?  Do you keep them?  Do you review them at the end of the year?

My intentions are always far more than the results of the resolutions I make.

My sister Natalie and I had a conversation about resolutions a few days before she (and kids) flew back to Colorado.  I asked if she had made or thought about resolutions and she said she had.  In return she asked me if I had made any.  My respsonse was yes – to pretty much change my personality and everything about me.

Towards the end of 2011 (over the Holidays), I thought a lot on who I became in 2011.  I let myself have a lot of excuses and freedom to react and think however I wanted without keeping either in check.  My reactions were sharp (as Natalie pointed out over the Holidays) and tactless.  And then mentally, I would beat myself up over what a crappy daughter, friend, and sister I was/am.  I became easily offended or hurt and shut down quickly.

I resolve to change those things about myself in 2012.  I know it’s a lifelong process – we all have “stuff” to work on.  Looking back at 2011, I’m not sure how I would do anything differently.  I still don’t know the “right” reactions to devastating news, criticism, etc….and I’m not concerned with the right way – I just know that in the future I want to try to do things different.

res·o·lute/ˈrezəˌlo͞ot/

Adjective:
Admirably purposeful, determined, and unwavering.
Synonyms:
determined – firm – decided – resolved – decisive

Happy Times of 2011

Wheeeeeeeeeeeew!  Collective sigh of relief to see 2011 come to an end!  Hallelujah, praise the Lord.  It was a tough year – for so many  – not just me.  With a new year here, I am more than ready (and overdue) to make some changes and tweaks in my life.  I’m not a big fan of the person who frequented 2011. Hello, me.  My reactions, thoughts, it was all too much….

So, even though I’d like to chalk last year up as a wash – that’s not quite fair – because that’s kind of a crappy outlook.  And while it was one of my tougher years, there was still much JOY to be had.

So, I have compiled a list of the “Happy Times of 2011.”

1. I turned 30.  Yep, that’s happy.  I made it!  We made it!

2. I didn’t have to have major surgery!

3. My elbow faired well for the first half of the year!  I cherish the good times with this darn elbow…

4. My bff got married and I was honored to be her maid of honor!

5. I got to spend a total of 4 months in North Dakota!  (So many highlights and happy times in this one…!  So thankful!)

6. Making new friendships!

7. Unexpected family time due to sad events or change of plans.

8. God changed my heart. Big time.  (in more ways than one….even physically!)

9. As always – watching the 5 little people in my life who call me Auntie – grow and learn!  Nothing better.

10. My parents…I kind of like them and all their support, encouragement, and love.  I think they’ve seen me at my worst this year, but loved me the most.